If I am honest it is not Coraline, the errant knight, or Suzanne's blind lover that I feel for. I relate to the beldam, the faery's child, Suzanne. This is partially because men have followed me blindly before, when I had no desire for them to do so.
I realize there is a twisted aspect to these characters, in other words. Not only do they fool others, but they also have their selves completely fooled. The heroes are not so different from the villains in these stories.
Keats, in his poem, seems to have been speaking about the poet's relationship to fantasy. I have often wondered if it is this ability toward fantasy that draws the victims to the villains.
These temptresses, especially Other Mother, can seem like they are capable of getting whatever they want. They can seem just as bad as the victims, as if they were only looking for their own happiness. But I can't help but project and wonder, if they are never getting the one thing that they actually want, someone to love them for who they really are. Because the temptresses realize that their worlds are fake, they want love to be real.
I mean doesn't anyone else feel that Coraline and the other children are really spoiled brats who don't care at all ever about the other mother or even their own parents but only want what the other mother can offer them? The ghost children admit they were given everything but wanted more.
The cat speculates about the reasons the other mother is the way she is. He first mentions that maybe she just wants to love and be loved. "She wants something to love, I think. Something that isn't her. Or, maybe she'd just love something to eat."
People strong in fantasy, strong people in general, have this way of making wills and circumstances bend their way. I think what the other mother is really attached to is the game. The cat also tells us she has a "thing" for them. It's a fun little game called "let's see who will actually try to get to know me, or at the very least manage to outwit me, instead of just walking into my trap like all the other idiots."
In Keat's poem I think the knight is a classic idiot. He follows a beautiful woman, he doesn't know who she is nor does he care, he gets what he gets.
Maybe what I am saying here is that I think blind love can only happen as an after effect of curious love. We must first approach another person with open mind, heart, and arms. Then we can close our eyes and take the extra blind leap of faith that love requires.
I have trouble believing that some brat that hates her own loving parents, and wouldn't even like me if she knew I am a spider, could ever love me. Coraline going to the other parents is never about loving them, it's all about Coraline. Likewise she doesn't take the time to see who her real parents are.
Likewise, I have trouble believing that the Knight took any time to see who the beautiful woman really was or even cared. Just so long as she is beautiful, and feeds him sweet things, and sings sweetly everything is fine.
I feel a bit more sympathy for Suzanne's lover. He seems to get her, and he seems to truly try to see who she is. He seems at the very least genuinely curious about her rather than what she can do for him. But even he accepts her tea and oranges, even though he feels he has no love to give her. The song doesn't absolutely doom him, though. I like to think he breaks the spell, that he gains insight into Suzanne, and actually loves her. (Note: Suzanne traps both heroes and children.)
As a woman who has been followed blindly, I know that the man following you has no idea who you are. You can say to their face, "look I have no love to give you." You can even admit that you have turned men into ghosts before, and yet that doesn't matter to them. These men think they're special, they're different, they could really have something. They could have your love, and eat your oranges, honey, and gravy from your gravy train. They could do all of this blind, thinking only of their selves, never trying to see or love who you really are, and somehow this could all end well.
Do you have any idea how annoying it is to be told you are loved by someone who it is obvious loves only self and what you can do for them?
It could turn you a little evil pretty easily. If these people are really only serving their selves, and there is no possibility of making them see who you really are, then it doesn't seem so bad to turn it around and use them.
Add to that the fact that each time it can feel like, maybe this time this knight/hero/child/ is different. Maybe this time they will open their eyes, see who I really am, and actually love me. You can trick your self into thinking, maybe it's okay to use others if they used me. Or maybe this time it isn't just a game, maybe I really care about this person. Certainly the Other Mother seems to have really tried to see who Coraline is and give her what she wanted.
When it comes to me, I find this game especially dangerous, because I really do want to make people happy and I really am trying to pay attention to who they actually are. But when I find out they were only after me for their own happiness, that they still don't know who I am or even care... I can turn into a bit of a monster.
It's hard to say whether I was a monster to begin with, or whether the fault lies with the victims. It's a dangerous cycle and it's hard to break. I like to think I am just looking for people to love. I know for sure I am not just looking for people to eat, as Coraline says "that's ridiculous". I only settle for "eating" people once I don't get what I really want.
But I wonder if what I am really looking for is somebody to love me. I wonder if that's what these other temptresses are looking for too. If we slowed down and allowed ourselves to pursue others with our own happiness in mind as well as theirs to begin with, in other words if we didn't trick ourselves from the start that we were really just concerned about others' happiness, then maybe we could break the cycle.
For the whole movie Coraline is so concerned about the fact that she is not being listened to, that she doesn't seem to realize she isn't listening to anyone else. It is only through confronting the Other Mother, that she learns there has to be some balance between being listened to and listening, between loving and being loved, between following blindly and opening your eyes in order to see people as they really are.